Welcome to the dorkier side of my life.
I’m hesitant to let you see my alter ego, Superfan, but maybe
sharing really is good therapy. You might ask, ‘How does one
become Superfan?’ In my case, a winning personality and a decent
disposable income. Actually it all started because I wanted to be
in the audience of ‘Whose Line is it Anyway?’ Unfortunately,
they don’t guarantee seats even when you have tickets. Then
I just happened to hear that the group would be performing in Las
Vegas and decided to go there instead. Who knew this whim would change
my life forever!
I was a virgin fan. While my friends were fantasizing
about kissing the tall, dark, and handsome leading man in a movie,
I imagined I was the girl saving the wild horse from the mean rancher.
So meeting TV stars was way outside my comprehension and I had no
idea what was in store for me in Vegas; didn’t even know if
I would get to meet anybody. I was just excited about being in the
audience for two pay-per-view tapings of the Improv Allstars.
I headed for Vegas with my camera and a copy of ‘Dirty
Jokes and Beer’ by Drew Carey. When the time came to head for
the first show, I took neither. I don’t like carrying stuff
around and I couldn’t imagine what I would do with an autograph
or picture even if I did get one. You just throw that stuff in a drawer
and never look at it again. I really wanted to say hello and shake
their hands – touch them, you know. Then after the show, THERE
THEY WERE!
I was in awe and went around helping people get pictures
with each celebrity, that way I got to meet every one of them. It
was better than I ever could have imagined. Even though I flew home
with no pictures and no autographs of my own, I was hooked. The Improv
Allstars are great entertainers and I laughed until my sides hurt.
I would have to do it again and thus was born the Pacific Northwest
Stalking Tour: Portland on Thursday, Seattle on Friday, Bellingham
on Saturday, and Victoria on Sunday. There are one or two performances
in each city and I go to all of them annually. Then I find other performances
during the year so I go to at least 20 improv shows every year. I
enjoy chatting with the comedians after the show – they don’t
know my name but they always recognize me and spend a few minutes
with me. Besides I bring them homemade cookies – what better
way to win a comedian’s heart? And you know, life is too short
not to laugh as much as you can.
Since that first trip, I have learned the value of
autographs and pictures. An autograph holds the celebrity’s
attention for a few seconds and that’s your opportunity to express
your feelings. It’s a good idea to decide ahead of time what
you would like to say to that person if you get the chance. My favorites
are ‘Thanks for making us laugh’ and ‘Thanks for
all your hard work and sharing your talents with us.’ Don’t
try to make them laugh; it’s their job and they’re far
more funny than you. Most of the time you just end up looking stupid
and you don’t get to let them know how you really feel. Autographs
are quick and you’re not the only one in line, so be succinct
with your little message of love.
Now pictures are where the fun begins. They put their
arm around you for the picture – you wanted to touch them, right?
Most of the time they’ll do an autograph and a picture, but
if you have to choose go for the picture (the touching thing, remember?).
One warning, you are ‘stranger danger’. They don’t
know you so don’t throw yourself around them the minute you
see them. Let them come to you. Respect their space and their time.
Gifts are not necessary. Or maybe they are – who am I to say?
If you feel so inclined, pick something up at the store that’s
easy to carry or pack in a suitcase. I’m from Texas so I like
to give Texas Pralines until I get to know someone, then it’s
cookies, cookies, cookies.
Following the Improv Allstars has inspired me to
try to meet many of my other idols. My family thinks I have lost my
mind because I plan my vacations and some weekends around performances
of favored celebrities on the chance of meeting them. I think nothing
of traveling across the country for a special performance. To date,
I have met Lily Tomlin, The Smothers Brothers, Harvey Korman, Tim
Conway, George Carlin, Eddie Izzard, Ted Allen, Brian Boitano, Michelle
Kwan, and Jason Dohring. It has even brought me to the Dork Forrest.
How great is that? Now you know how I became Superfan. Any ideas on
getting a few seconds with Matthew McConaughey???
(ED: dangit... you mention the touching thing a TAD too much.
But you do what you need to do to fight the terrorists. If we all
just do a little bit.)
(Oh... and I told Val that the FIRE DEPT doesn't even take home-baked
goods anymore and she said, "Oh - I've never had a problem like
that with comics." Of course you haven't. Desparate for free
shit... of course not).
Rock yer dorkdom.
